Thursday, March 26, 2009

The most nasty vegetarian meal I ate this Lenten season...

Only fourteen more days of vegetarian eating for me, and today, I hit an all time low. The thing about vegetarian eating is that it requires preplanning. This morning, I was well on my way to work when it dawned on me that I had not made any dinner plans for tonight. It's Thursday, the most difficult meal night of the week for us because the cherubs have piano lessons at 6:30 in Canton. This means I need to have dinner cooked and eaten and be out the door at 6:00 pm. On a good day, I can get home by 5:15, but more typically, it's 5:30.

While eating meat, the best solution to my problem of forgetting to plan would be chicken fingers and fries that the cherubs can start in the oven for me before I get home. I wracked my brain and remembered I bought some kind of fake meat like product at the beginning of Lent. Was it Quorn, the chicken nuggets made out of fungus? A veggie burger? I couldn't remember...but when I left at a decent hour and got home a little after 5 and dug deep in the deep freeze and found these gems - meatless meatballs! What was I thinking? Meatless meatballs...WTF?

I popped them in the oven with the fries and chicken fingers for the kids. The so called meatless meatballs were graylike blobs that looked like misshapen golf balls that were painted with a brownish color. What IS the brownish color? The phrase "ass putty" came to my mind, because that's how my friend Patti described natural peanut butter a few days ago. A total of 15 minutes later, my dinner was ready. These things literally tasted like NOTHING. They had NO FLAVOR. I tried dousing them with chili sauce, and that didn't work either. I chucked them in the trash and instead, I just ate a plate of fries and some leftover chocolate chip cookie dough.

These last two weeks of Lent are going to be hard, really hard. I'm already planning on smoking a beef brisket to go along with the traditional Easter ham. It's going to be a veritable meat fest at my house on Easter. The only joy I have found in this Lenten sacrifice is that I don't feel guilty if I eat sweets or carbs...I have been eating my fill of both and haven't gained a pound. I've discovered that I really would prefer to eat meat than chocolate and bread, which was a surprise to me.


Anonymous said...

Ha ha! Imagine putting the peanut butter ON the "balls"....

Buttercup said...

Too bad fish sticks have gotten so expensive and also a bit dubious (though maybe not more dubious than your meatballs). I bought some at Whole Foods that were expensive, organic, and fairly tasteless because not made with all the nice hydrogenated oil that they used to be. Would have been ok if deep-fried. Anyway, that would have been something of a solution to your immediacy problem.

TennZen said...

I tried quorn "skinless breasts" with bbq sauce on them.

I've never eaten them again. Yuck, yuck, yuck.

About the only good pseudo-meat stuff I've ever had was gardenburger, boca products, and a tvp product I found online.

LutheranChik said...

So...I'm didn't like them? LOL

I'm not a big fan of meat analogs...I do like the Quorn chicken "filets" cubed into curry or something like that, but they're so nasty looking out of the box that I have to really work my way into cooking with them.

Mom said...

Yes, Buttercup, fish sticks would be a great thing to have in the freezer for moments such as this. I did have some, but we ate them already. I'll have to stock up to get me through the next 14 days.

SlowRunner said...

So, what's up? The Kraft people went on strike? Just empty the day-glo cheez packet and you're done. It probably rules over anything involving ass.

Anonymous said...

Southwest vegetarian bake (core)

3/4 c uncooked brown rice
1.5 c water
1 can (15 oz) black beans, rinsed and drained
1 can (11 oz) corn
1 can (10 oz) Ro-Tel brand tomatoes and chiles
1 c salsa
1 c (8 oz) FF sour cream
1 c (4 oz) FF or soy cheddar shreds
1/4 tsp pepper
1/2 c chopped red onion
1 can (2.25 oz) sliced ripe olives, drained
1 c (4 oz) FF or soy Monterey Jack shreds (or cheddar, if you can't find Monterey Jack)

In a large saucepan, bring rice and water to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 35-40 minutes, until tender.

In a large bowl, combine the beans, corn, tomatoes, salsa, sour cream, cheddar cheese, pepper, and rice. Transfer to a shallow 2.5 qt baking dish coated with nonstick cooking spray. Sprinkle with onion and olives.

Bake, uncovered, at 350* for 30 minutes. Sprinkle with Monterey Jack cheese. Bake 5-10 minutes longer or until heated through and cheese is melted. Let stand for 10 minutes before serving.
. . . . . . . . . .Kids will love this one too.